Hearts of Stone

Carpinteria is 'a healing place' I've been told, and mystical land that it is - our beaches are scattered with heart-shaped rocks. Jan K showed and gave me my first heart rock, and since then I've shared the joy of searching for these stones during long, thoughtful walks on the beach in every season.

While Stephen was here I told him of the heart rocks, and soon his eyes were glued to the ground. Tenacious in his search (as in everything) he soon presented me with a lovely smooth heart of stone.

Today I emailed him in Ushuaia, where it is snowing and well into winter.

"I found the most amazing heart rock yesterday," I said. "It is hard, and roughly chiseled by the sea, but most definitely a heart!"

'Send a picture' he said and I did.

"Funny thing about this heart rock," I added, "as roughty- toughty as it appears, i had to prop it up -- it does not want to stand on its own!"

RESET!

It seems to be, as JenJen puts it, a time to 'reset expectations'. Some higher, some lower, some simply different.

What molds our expectations? I did a workshop on this years ago: so often our expectations are shaped by the strangest input - media, misinterpretation, other people with unique skills and traits - and our expectations don't end up actually matching the individual/situation at hand at all! (Although it appears to be the other way around!)

With our expectations doomed from the start, they fail. Our reaction is disappointment - which the subject can sense - and around and around the frustration goes!

So here I am, resetting my expectations: for certain people, family members, standard of living, fitness, relationships, finances, career, and myself. Once I establish a realistic expectation I guess I can decide whether that's acceptable or not. In some cases: no. Why 'hang with the turkeys' if you want to 'soar with the eagles'? So if my expectations are so low, let's say, of the Fisherman - honestly: Why would I want him around anyway???

By contrast, I am hoisting my expectations for Coco. She has a big year ahead - we have named it 'The Year of Endurance'. She had a lot of challenges, which will require more discipline, tenacity and organization than ever before. But I have promised to be her #1 fan and supporter and help her achieve this if she promises to give it her all.

For me, it's more difficult. My expectations of myself have always been warped, so this needs work. But here in the midst of my 'year of the F-word' I find myself looking more keenly at my future - what and where it will bring me - and that self-exploration will help me set high goals for myself.

I wouldn't expect anything less.

So many travels, so little time!

So much has happened since my last post :-O !! Here is the 'before' picture -on the way to Costa Rica - June (l) and I (r) had a fabulous vacation in this tropical wonderland ... got home and my darling 'Capt Bruce' came to visit for 10 days ... then we both left LAX last week: he back to Ushuaia and me to PV for 4 days of racing. I am beat, bronze and broke - LOL! More to come ...